Yelp meets dating...

Getting fixed up on a blind date, is always one of those times where you reach true clarity.  when you get there, it’s like, that’s what you thought I’ld settle for? Someone that looks like Jabba the Hut with T-Rex arms? Who doesn’t drink?  It’s not that I want to date an alcoholic, but I don’t like quitters! Know what I’m sayin?  And they are a virgin? Cause seriously it’s too much prepwork.  I want someone who’s been around the block and knows what not to expect at this point.

Dating is horrible enough.  Dating sites make it worse cause they tell you nothing really.  What?! They like long walks on the beach?!?  So do I!  They like dogs?  So do I! It’s ridiculous. 

Don’t you wish you could treat dating like YELP?  If you’ve been living under a rock for the past 5 years, Yelp is a review -site where people go to complain about things cause they are too passive-aggressive to speak up for themselves in the first place.   “I went to a restaurant and the server was so mean, they wouldn’t cut the crust off of my bread like my mommy would.”

There should be a Yelp dating site where you can see other people’s reviews of dates with a given person.  You wouldn’t buy a car without reading reviews!  Ads would be like “Yelp Dating for people who’d rather complain about it… The name could be Illsettlefor5outof10.com”

Could you imagine the reviews? “He doesn’t believe in pre-marital sex?”  Fuck that…  “oh allergic to latex… compulsive lier”