Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Something that happens when you're GAY

In my experience, when a man is gay, the common assumption is that they must be single. We all apparently fit a certain mold. I don't know if this is the case for lesbians. For them, the opposite is probably true. They meet each other, get a U-haul, a guinness and they are coupled off. That is just my observation of what people assume about lesbians though. It's just odd to me. If I am out at a bar, working or just hanging out, there is always some straight girl that has to approach me. They start to ask me questions about being gay, because as gays we automatically become the embassadors of anything gay. It is apparently our duty to speak on behalf of every other gay which is odd. The fact that they assume I am gay doesn't bother me because that is nothing to be ashamed of. It's the second part that bothers me.

They always have to make the same comment which is something along the lines of, "have you met my friend ______? I think he would be perfect for you. Sure he's 400 pounds and still lives with his mother, but he's gay."

It's stupid. Just because we a re both friends of Dorothy doesn't mean we are going to be a match. Second, I wouldn't use the same logic and fix up my straight friends based on the fact that they have corresponding genetalia. After the clueless straight girl makes her brilliant statement of how she thinks she has just my match, I tell her whats up nicely.

Me: "Sorry, I'm actually I have a boyfriend."

Her: "Oh, well then after that's over."

Me: "Huh?"

Her: "Where is your partner right now?"

Me: "We aren't connected at the hip and we aren't in business together."

Her: "Um... okay. How long have you been partnered?"

Me: "We have been together a few years but we aren't opening up any businesses any times soon, he is my boyfriend."

Who the hell has that kind of response? This exchange of words happens at least once a month. Not sure where this is going but I'm sure this will turn into a joke somehow...

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