Friday, December 13, 2013

Hooters and Booze revisited

     A buddy of mine decides he wants to take the punge and get married so we take him to my favorite pleace in the whole world, Hooters.  My other buddy is with us.  For the sake of this story we shall call him Mike, because that's his name.  Mike walks up to a waitress.  He pinches her ass.  She smacks his face.  He walks away and says, "fucking Lesbian!"

When he gets back to the table I say, "Mike, you can't do that."

He says, "I'm a little drunk."

Me, "A little drunk?  You've has a drink..."

I hate people who once they have had even a drop of booze they blame every wrong move they make for the rest of the night on booze.  It doesn't make sense.  I wouldnt blame Sake for Pearl Harbor, tequilla for stealing American jobs or gin for Ann Coulter.  I woud do the last one.  Not sure why.  That's besides the point.  you can't blame booze and take liability off of yourself.  I wish that's how life worked. If it did I think filling out a birth certificate would go like this.

A nurse asks, "Excuse me ma'am can you spell out the father's name for the birthcertificate?"

Mom, "Um.... V-O-D-K-A?"

Nurse spells the name back to himself, "Is that a Scandanavian name?"

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