Strangers always ask me the weirdest things to me. I was on a BART train earlier today, cause I'm rich. This stranger comes up, stares me straight in the eye and asks, "are you Jewish?"

Without missing a beat, I respond, "are you blind?"

I guess I should have mention that I am holding a penny-saver while this was going down.

People tell me all the time that Judaism is just a religion and not a race. I say otherwise. If Judaism is just a religion, then why do strangers on a daily basis ask me if I'm from New York? Or if I like Bagels and lox, which I don't. Or offer me their Kosher meals on flights. Comedian whom I don't know, constantly stare at me whenever telling any holocaust jokes cause I, Jewie Mc Jew-Jew face must be the moral compass of such a joke. I am the same person that laughs at funerals. I should be no one's moral anything.

Whenever people hear my name, Yuri, there is always one question that follows. "Jewish?"

Why do they have to ask if my name is Jewish? Is it because I have a curly storm of hair that screams "yes, I am circumcised?" I don't get it. No, my name is NOT a Jewish name, not that there is anything wrong with such. Even though I have a face that that makes one miss their bubie, want to run out and buy a Challah bread roll, even though my name is not Jewish. It's not even close to a Jewish, Yiddle-yeedle name (that is the sound that comes into my head at the mention of Jewish things). My name is what resulted from Barbarians and Vikings both raping and pillaging the Russian country-side. What I'm getting at is to stop being so racist and jumping the gun people. If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck it could just be someone that looks like a duck in a duck costume.