I just returned to San Francisco after a week visiting my mother in Austin. Having not grown up there and spending the first 20 years of my life in Southern California, I have no comprehension for Austin. Their city's slogan is "Keep Austin Weird," I think it should be "Keep Austin Confusing with Highways That Make No Logical Sense." Their freeways have all these misleading loops and signs that make it very difficult to understand where the fuck you're going. As for the actual weirdness, I didn't actually see it. The only weird part of being there was when we got Styrofoam cups. After living in SF over 6 years, where not composting is literally a crime, this seemed just plain bazaar. I Austin interesting, more than I did the last 3 times I went because this time I actually explored the city and all the towns around it.
Having never been to Texas, my boyfriend, Guy was determined to get his hands on BBQ every step of the way. We started by stuffing our fat faces at a chain called Rudy's, where even the vegetables were covered in fat, sugar or glazed goodness. This proved quite delicious. In the 5 days I was there, I probably ate an entire cow on my own.
We also went to this place called Gourdough's. Austin has picked up to this lunch truck trend so popular in LA and SF. This specific truck though was the best I have ever seen. They make doughnuts the size of Larry King's forehead and cover them with enough toppings to make Paula Dean throw in the towel. It was delicious enough to eat there three times throughout the trip.
Being gay, I was worried that Texas would not welcome us. I was worried that I wouldn't fit in. Once I saw a sign displayed in the center of town that Liza herself would be performing that week, I knew Austin wasn't half bad. Once we reached a gay bar with a $1 drink special which went all night, we knew we could hang there for a while. While people from Austin kept telling us that their town was just like San Francisco, I begged to differ. Half of them couldn't argue because truth be told, by the end of the conversation many admitted to never having visited the over-priced city by the bay. Austin was quant, and definitely a fun visit. Unlike San Francisco, I was not accosted by a bum or punk kid asking for money even once. No one coughed at Guy when he went to light his cigarette the way passive-aggressive San Franciscans normally do.
Point is, Austin, you're not half bad and we will meet again soon. I am back and working on more comedy. I have been adding dates left and right. Check my facebook page.
All photos taken by Guy Avoth.
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